Humans are intricately wired as social beings, we are created for connection and interaction with other people. It is practically impossible for anyone to live in total isolation.

More so, we are soul beings, we have the capacity for varying emotions, we communicate verbally and otherwise which all culminates to augment our relationship with other people.

Friendship and companionships is a vital part of relating with other people. It could be defined on different levels. However, many people assume anyone around them as friends.

I would define friendship as a relationship of commitment guided by love, trust, mutual respect, and unflinching support of one another. 

It is of paramount importance to be intentional about who one chooses as a friend. The people in your circle can have ripple effects on you more than you can quickly realize.

Do your friends build you up? Do you get cheered on to reach greater heights by those in your cycle? What kind of words do you hear constantly by those around you? Do you feel you are the odd one amidst your friends?

It is great to have friends, it is much more empowering to have people around you who support and cheer you. Moreover, it is better to have people around you, whose values align with yours, people going in the same direction with you and even those that have gone ahead the path you’re walking.

Association with the wrong people can bring untold regret and pain. I’ve come to realise that the words you hear from those around you shape your thoughts and eventually become reality more than you can imagine.

I’ve had friends told me “you can do this or that” when I thought I couldn’t, the affirmations from my friends empowered me and I went on to achieve that thing.

Another thing that stands out in friendship is trust/authenticity. It is important to have trustworthy and truthful friends who as well are authentic enough to be real with one another’s struggles and victories.

What I find most amazing about friendship is having a friend tell you some bitter truths to your face which’d help you become better. How wonderful it is that instead of gossip, your friend comes to you and says ‘this/that was not good enough, you’ve got to fix it”? How lovely?

Friendship is not just about being around each other or having fun together. Friendship is intentionality, friendship is love, it is committing to the success and progress of one another, it is trust and faithfulness. It is accountability. Friendship should be purposeful and altogether lovely.

Each individual should bring value to the table, with great regard and kindness towards one another. Friendship should provide for purposeful partnerships, support circles and accountability.

I’ll ask you again; who are your friends?

Written by: Aanuoluwapo Adekola.

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