Heyyyy sugar, how are you?

Tonight I write with mixed feelings as its the end of one road for me and the beginning of another. I just resigned the 9-5, I secured a year ago so as to launch my own company.

I registered my consulting firm 5 years ago and I went on hibernation. I literally just printed business cards, built a website, created a company profile and training module, told myself I just wanted to take a nap and I will resume the next morning.

It’s morning 5 years later… I’m just waking up from 5 winters, autumns, summers and springs. The fear of the unknown froze me and stifled every ounce of creativity, zest or enthusiasm that initially brought out the idea that I should do my own thing.

I used motherhood as the excuse, Oh! I’m nursing at the moment, Oh I just enrolled for my masters program and I can’t juggle both, Oh! I’m writing my project, Oh! I just realized I’m pregnant with another child. Oh! I’m a nursing mother, Ohh! I just enrolled for my PhD and I think I want to focus on it full time.

So many ohs saw me 5 years back to where I started. I want to start my own company. Now the excuses are no longer valid as I have accomplished those milestones. The new hurdle is self doubt.

Can you really do it? Are u a born leader or follower? Can you manage a company of your own? What do you know that you can offer? Can you address a room of people? Will they be interested in what you have to say? Will they pay for your services?

These are all the questions running a 200 meters race in my mind. Anxiety and her yard people want to have their August meeting in my mind again o. Chai! which kind of thing be this?

The fear of no more regular income is giving me a big sarcastic look and sneering at me, and I’m wondering if resigning wasn’t a mistake after all. However, looking at the past 5 years, the most crucial lesson I have learnt is understanding the seasons of our lives.

The first time, I was not in the season of my life where I could handle the responsibility of owning something of myself and nurturing it to maturity. I was emotionally drained and overwhelmed with too many things to equip my mind with the right set of beliefs, convictions, knowledge and will power necessary to stay the course of running my own ship.

Presently, I know I’m better prepared to fight for my life, rearrange my thoughts, shut out the noises, reaffirm my resolve to give failure no chance by looking life in the face and giving it all it takes. I’m very scared BUT I’m doing it afraid. I’m taking my leap and I’m so certain I’m landing on two feet on the other side.

If I stumble, I will just dust myself up and keep on moving. The lady I worked for told me, “You remind me of that character in the cartoon that gives up on his digging inches away from the gold 🙄” I said no o, I will be okay.

In my mind, I said this lady does not even understand that I’m gold personified, I ain’t looking for no gold. All the gold I need is in me so I just need to dig it out from the rivers of living water in my belly. I have all it takes to flourish, and like the palm tree set by the rivers side, flourish I will.

I have set targets for my self as it concerns my company. I have written down my goals and the timelines for accomplishments. I have people I’m accountable to and I have put it out in the universe that I have a consulting firm so that the universe itself will acquiesce.

Whatever major moves we want to make in life, is it setting up a company, relocating, getting married, starting a course, writing a book, whatever the venture we strongly desire to accomplish, we must put some major things in place.

First, take the leap. Do you want to get married? Start by writing a list of who you must become in order to attract the kind of person you desire. Do you need to be more tolerant, more kind, more generous, more considerate, more responsible? Take conscious efforts to see that you unlearn bad habits and learn new ones.

Secondly, understand the seasons of your life. Are you emotionally and financially able to start a family? Do you have a job, business or any source of income? Have you equipped yourself with the technical skills necessary to secure a job or business? These are the things you need to check off your bucket list.

Thirdly, put processes in place. Will you be more sociable? Learn to network, erase the permanent scowl on your face that says DO NOT DISTURB. Don’t be in a hurry to leave church after service. Accept that invitation to the beach, cook out or hangout. Take good care of yourself, treat yourself to a nice staycation, spa or eat out. Love yourself well enough so you can love another person. Lastly, believe that it is okay to fail but at least you have tried and you can try again.

As Steve Harris once said, “It is not what you don’t have that limits you, it is what you have that you don’t know how to use.” These words hit home deep because, as humans we are imbued with a resolve; a strong determination to win, so let’s stay winning. Let’s keep our hope alive, let’s take the leap, let’s launch out into the deep, let’s take a chance. If we do, trust me on this, we might not be exactly be where we hope to be, but we definitely won’t be where we used to be.

Till some other time sugar, stay winning😍

Written by Lady D